Nursing home team gives dogs a fair shot—September 25, 2009—By: Edie Gross
Summary: The Fancy Friends 4-H dog club brought their dogs to the Heritage Hall last Saturday to prepare them for tomorrow’s competition. One of their members uses a motorized wheelchair and to get their dogs to used to being around these wheelchairs, they brought their dogs to the Heritage Hall to work alongside the residents in motorized wheelchairs for the day.
Critic: The article uses numerous quotes but many aren’t inside quotation marks, which makes it difficult to tell what is quote and what isn’t. It also leaves the reader questioning whether the non-quotation marked quotes are accurate as some quotes are contained within quotation marks. The paragraph length also changes, with paragraphs on the first page being mostly one sentence paragraphs and ones on the inside averaging two to three sentences each. The author’s phraseology could use some work as sentences are constantly bouncing all over the place, interrupting the flow.
--Becky Walker
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